just trying to be normal ...

by Vicki
(Virginia, US)

your site is very good, thank you - it helps me

I have disorders due to my upbringing - and I will continue to work on my self awareness and doing better until the day I can no longer do this.

I was aware that my mother was "not right" very early on. I read Kahlil Gibran in 1st Grade clearly - "your children are not your children" ... that was the way, I just knew it. She was a terrible mother when the doors closed. To the outside world, she was great. I just wanted to be accepted and loved for the child/person I was. Never happened as she was not capable. I had to get away from her, she made me sick.

She was definitely narcissistic and dives into other disorders as well. I didn't know until about age 45. I am now 56 and growing exponentially.

I agree with you about the need to have education in raising children; this world will just become worse as more are raising the same. I do have fear for the future for this very same reason. Babies being forgotten and left locked inside hot cars; school shootings, animal abuse - all victims of the past and bad behaviors just trickling down the line ...

I've marked your site and will continue to read and re-read and learn. My last therapist (an angel) did EMDR on me for PTSD and it helped tremendously. Somehow I was always able to function well enough in the world and I am trying to help my son be aware of all of this so my grandchildren do better. I went back to school and got my bachelors degree and my paper was on "Conflict in the Workplace" - people come into the workplace with disorders that should have been treated long before - so perhaps we should certify parents and target early childhood and raise children with a larger community to observe and rely on.

Thanks again, hope to talk to you again some time- V

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